On Allergies.

I was 5 the first time I got strep throat. It was fun. Being the ‘I’m so adverse to a doctor's office I’ll pass out just thinking about one’ kind of mom she is, Julie waited until I was pretty sick to take me to see a pediatrician. Upon arrival they swabbed my tonsils, gave me a shot of penicillin and some antibiotics, and sent us home. Like any young sickling would do I fell into a fitful slumber only to wake up to a head-to-toe poison ivy looking rash and faint breathing. Low and behold we found out I have a penicillin allergy. It turned out to be nothing that a hot oatmeal bath and time couldn’t fix, but at the time it SUCKED. I mean, obviously it really, really sucked- I still remember how it felt (and I don’t have that good of a memory). Now, 18 years later, any time I frequent a doctor’s office the first thing I’m sure to note on my chart is that I’m allergic to penicillin. I swerve on that hoe so hard.

It wasn’t anyone’s fault that I had such a bad allergic reaction to it. We never would’ve known if it wasn’t for the trial-and-error. But we left it at just that- one trial and one error.

The older I get the more I’ve started to view certain types of people as allergies. In a world of 7 billion plus we’re bound to butt heads with a few different personality types. We’re unique individuals with different tastes, motivators, passions, etc. There’s absolutely no way we could all live in perfect harmony together. Sorry if that sounds cynical but Eve supposedly ate the apple, not me. I was even browsing around in Barnes & Noble one time and I saw a book titled 'The Sociopath Next Door.'  It's written by a psychologist who claims that 1 in 25 Americans is a sociopath. Suffice it to say that's one type of person right there I'm allergic to.

Do I think everyone deserves a second chance? Absolutely. Humans are entitled to a few more trial-and-errors than a life-threatening medicine. At the same time, there’s no point in forcing certain relationships to work- whether they're intimate, platonic, family related, etc.- if they just don’t work. It doesn’t mean either of you is a bad person. It means that, for whatever reason, the two of you cannot and will not see eye-to-eye. So save yourself some allergic reactions and go hangout with one of the other 6,999,999,999+ people in this world.

Main Takeaways:

'Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice shame on me.'

Surround yourself with others that see the best in you even when you're all 'sweat pants, hair tied, chillin' with no makeup on' ...both metaphorically and literally.

xo.

On Basic Bitches.

 

Watch out world, there’s a not-so-new kind of girl- one that is both basic and bitchy; and it looks like she’s here to stay a while. Are you an aspiring ‘Basic Bitch?’ Or, if you’re already on your way, are you wondering if you’re there yet and need a few tangible checkpoints? Look no further. This list is the end-all to any and all of your basic questions. 

If you love, actively participate in, or have been guilty of 15 or more of the following things on this ‘Basic’ A-Z list, chances are, you’re a Basic Bitch- just like me. Congratulations!

 

’50 Shades of Grey’

80s Movies

Anything Artisan

Anything Leopard Print

Artsy Pictures

Bar Method

Being In A Relationship

Being On Fleek

Being Single

Being Thirsty

Being Too Hungover At Class/Work to Function

Bike Rides

Bleached Hair

Blogging

Book Clubs

Booties

Bottle Service

Brunch

Burgers

Calling Wine ‘Vino’

Captioning IG Pics with Song Lyrics

Cats

Checking FB On Your Phone When You Already Have it Pulled Up On Your PC

Chips & Guac

Christmas Gift Exchanges

Coffee

Cranberry Vodkas

Creating Future ‘Wedding Boards’ on Pinterest

Crop Tops

Cupcakes

David Yurman

Day Drinking

Detoxing

Dinner Parties

Dogs

Donuts

Drunkenly Becoming Besties with Girls in Bathrooms

Eyebrow Waxing, Threading, & Dying

Face Contouring

Fall

Falling In Love

Fedoras

Feeling Like The World Hates You

Filters

Flannels

Food Documentation

Food Trucks

Frequenting Dog Parks When You Have No Dog

Fresh Pressed Juice

Friendsgiving

Froyo

Getting Engaged

Getting Married

Going Up On A Tuesday

Guys With Man Buns

Guys With Facial Hair

Guys with Tats

Grocery Shopping at Whole Foods/Trader Joe’s/Central Market

Group Texting

Heartbreak

Heated Debates About Which SATC Characters You & Your Friends Are

High-Waisted Jean Shorts

Home Decorating

Iced Green Tea

Infiniti Scarves

Inspirational Quotes

Keeping Up With the Kardashians

Kendra Scott

Leather Leggings

Midi Rings

Mimosas

Mini Bundt Cakes

Music Festivals

Never Seriously Considering Dating Anyone Who Doesn’t Have An iPhone

Nude Lips

Ombres

OOTD/OOTN Pics

Oversized Sweaters

Overuse of Emoji’s

Oxygen

Parks

Passive Aggressively Texting Your Ex

Pilates

Pinterest

Pizza

Planning A Future Wedding With A Guy You Just Met

Pretending Like You’re Not Into The Guy Who’s Into You

Pretending Like You’re Taylor Swift

Rainy Days

Ranting About Your Ex’s New GF

Red Lipstick

Rollerblading

Rompers

Saying You’re Going To Start Eating Healthier

Saying You’re Going To Start Working Out

Selfies

Self-Help Articles

Sex And The City

Simultaneously Posting On Your IG & Twitter

Singing Girl Power Songs in the Car

Shellac Manicures

Showing Up to Work or Class Smelling Like the Bar You Went to the Night Before

Snapchat

Spin-Offs of an Already Ongoing Group Text

Spring

Stalking A Guy You Just Met On Every Social Media Platform Available

Starbucks

Succulents

Summer

Sunglasses

Sunny Days

Talking About How Much You Want To Travel

Talking About The Aforementioned Guy That’s Into You

Talking to Anyone Who Will Listen About What You Ate On Any Given Day

Tailgating

Taylor Swift

Telling Off A Stranger Because You Had Too Many Cranberry Vodkas

Telling Your Friends You Are NOT Looking to Date

The Bachelor

The Bachelorette

The Color Scheme White & Camel

Tory Burch

Uggs

Use of Hashtags

Use of the Phrase ‘This Girl’ or ‘This Guy’

Waking Up & Having No Idea What Happened The Night Before

Wine & Cheese Boards

Winter

Workout Clothes

Yoga

 




I'm only kidding. You know that, right?


Main Takeaways:


The fact that you're a little quirky, are really amazing at life, and have a stellar sense of style doesn't make you a Basic Bitch.


You're exceptionally far from the usual.


xo.

On Inadequacy.

I have a hard time with my inadequacy. I think of it as this scary masked face that comes out to taunt me when I’m alone with my thoughts and feeling vulnerable. It mockingly asks me questions like, “why do you feel worthy?” and, “don’t you know that no one cares what you have to say?” It’s a task to reconcile why anyone would willingly choose to read my thoughts. I’ve gone from being closed off to an open book in a matter of weeks. It’s terrifying, exhilarating, and quite frankly, a little embarrassing. To pour my heart and soul out to you-  a friend, acquaintance, or complete stranger, makes me feel a little raw and uneasy. I don’t view myself as being anymore intellectual, experienced, or worthy than a single damn person on this earth. I am, however, a lover of connection. I yearn to maybe write something that speaks to you or tell you something that you need to be reminded of. More than anything, I want you to know that I’m here. That I, just like you, have experienced skinny love, heart break, and countless disappointments. I’ve had the up-all-nights where: something has gone so terribly wrong that I don't know what to physically do with my body, if pillows had ears they’d be deaf from all the screams they've cushioned, and there’s a private ocean in my mind of all the tears I’ve cried.

In elementary school boys laughed at my body, the person I thought liked me was actually having girls write fake 'love notes' for him, and a teacher yelled at me for sticking up for my friend. By middle school I started giving up bits and pieces of myself because when you’re all wrapped up in puberty and braces it’s easier to try and fit in than to stand out. In high school I didn’t make the cheerleading squad when all of my friends did, my voice wasn’t deemed ‘fit’ enough to be part of the traveling choir, and I made some bad choices that caused a temporary but painful falling out between me and my best friend. Freshman year of college I was robbed of countless friendships because I’d consistently forgo things like mixers and fraternity parties as I was trying to make a long distance relationship work. By sophomore year I was at a new school where I didn’t really fit in. Junior, Senior, and one year post-grad I was grasping so hard at that same relationship that my wrists grew sore and my true heart's desires became unrecognizable.

I won’t sit here and pretend like I’ve experienced any real hardships besides those that come with the awkward territory of growing up. I was born in America, the land of the free, to both a mother and a father. Through the years I’ve had some killer friends that have always remained constants. I also have two sisters that think the world of me. What I’m getting at is this: somewhere along the way I lost who I was because I was too scared to be the authentic version of myself. I was fearful of what people might think of me if the security blanket of my carefully constructed façade were to be ripped out of my grasp. The more of myself I gave up, the less I recognized the person looking back at me in the mirror. It got to the point where I wouldn't even make eye contact with my own reflection. I wasn’t happy and I didn’t feel good enough so I numbed myself with things of convenience like alcohol, guys, anger, and indifference. They say most people won’t change until it’s too painful not to. That was the case here. I don’t know when exactly the train back to my own heart picked me up but it did, and it’s moving at lightening speed- straight ahead- no looking back. The world needed me in my truest form, just like it needs you. The people who are meant to stay in my and your life will be able to keep up and those who aren’t will fall behind. It’s not an ‘I’m better than you’ mentality; it's: ‘I’m finally doing me, so would you please either hold my hand or get out of the way?’

Main Takeaways:


You are not your past mistakes, fears, or rejections.
You are your dreams, desires, and affections.

No one is as worthy of playing the lead role in your life as you are.
You are brilliant beyond comparison in your own way.
You bring something to the table that not a single other soul on this planet ever could.

xo.